Monday, September 1, 2008

Maybe I Am Satan

Last night I worked the patio--I have never seen so many out of control children. Parents were just letting there children run all over the place! At one point, when I was at the wait station I said, "I hate children." To this comment, a co-worker turned to me and said, "That's just evil. Only the devil hates kids." Well, maybe I am Satan, but children should be taught to behave, and shouldn't be left to run wild through a patio that is a accident waiting to happen. And, as an amendment to my comment about hating children, I say, "I hate inattentive parents." Every last one of the parents on the patio last night were more concerned with their adult conversation then their children getting a plate in the face.
At one point, I was taking an order at a table, and when I backed up to walk away, I knocked this little boy who was standing behind me. He smacked his face on the chair, and I immediately apologized, but inside I was strangling the parents. What are you doing??
Parents, teach children that sitting while eating is customary. If you choose to eat while running around, wrestling with your brother, or racing in between tables, then you may not be in the right establishment--that's called Chucky *fucking* Cheese.
Thank you.


The Woman said...

You're not really Satan. You just play him on television. Tee hee. I agree with you. Most parents now are very poor disciplinarians, and they set very low expectations of their children in public and then blame the subsequent injuries on anyone else. That's a shame.

Miranda said...

I'm a server and I had a child that was literally laying across the aisle! When I finally had "the nerve" to say something to this brat, his dad gave me an evil look. I politely informed him that I only said something to this child FOR HIS OWN SAFETY and the dad rolled his eyes and made the child sit in his seat. Wow sitting in your seat while you eat - what a concpt!

Carol said...

I agree with you a thousand percent.

queen of clean said...

I couldn't agree more, so that makes us both Hell bound!

My boys wouldn't dare run around in a restaurant, I just don't let them, I have an even smarter answer than theirs..every time!

On the other hand, my 4 year old is autistic...lets just say he doesn't 'do' eating out!

Anonymous said...

I as a server who mind you doesnt get much air when jumps have had to somehow vault over the top of a small kid more than once while possessing "full hands" that was running amuck. The most vivid memory was when I was working at Mac Shack (Macaroni Grill). The bowls of pasta and sauce were so hot I was barely able to hold them. Guess who would have been named in the lawsuit when the brat got scaled? I lost the ability to feel heat while cooking in high school at McDonalds so when I say hot most folks just think burning inducing hot.

I learned to wait tables in a Mexican restaurant. How I miss the days when Mexicans could be used as a scary threat to ratchet down the behavior of a wayward child even in front on the parents to settle down a overtly obnoxiously loud one. I just had to say (name the behavior to fix) kids here at Rest X get to go in back and wash dishes (then pause in a whisper with the Mexicans).

These days I would probably get sued or reported for child abuse.

BUT ultimately its part of the sad symptom of the problem in America that one is no LONGER responsible for their actions -its always someone else's fault. In this case parents who fail to parent.

Any freaking idiot knows you can only take little kids out for so long because if they dont pass out (harder to do when you let them drink a 1/2 gallon of caffinated soda or god forbid some coffee based bev) then they get bored and attempt to play.

Anonymous said...

as a proud parent and former server, i hear you.
for all those parents with unruly kids, my near 4 year old is proof that proper table manners an restaurant behavior can be taught.

K said...

I think it is interesting that your coworkers consider you to be Satan when you say that you hate children. At my work, when I say, "God, I fucking hate kids!" the others join in with similar sentiments, and we vow to never raise spoiled bastards that run from one end of the restaurant to the other, tripping up servers and spilling cracker/milk/crayon paste on all that they touch.


purplegirl said...

I'm Satan too, then. Let's go prod some evildoer's souls with pitchforks together.

doctressjulia said...

I hate kids, too! Little fucking shits- and, yes, their pompous, inattentive parents, too. I work at a bar and grill and I will not hesitate to redirect a child (we all do it), loudly, so that their parents can be embarrassed about their shitty parenting. Ha!