Thursday, July 3, 2008


I would like to start by posting an amendment to my previous post. Written earlier in the week, I decided that it was a waste of my time to bitch about my restaurant. Even though I'm going to try to accept the way it's run, my bitchiness will have to be channeled elsewhere...I have chosen the guests. They do so many nice things for me, I figure I'll give them the spotlight for a while. Why not?
Tonight I felt like I was waiting on people from Mars. They just weren't right...I don't know. I was sat with a five-top (2 couples and the odd man). They ranged in age from 40 - 65. They were alright (at first). Then things started to go wrong. They start to order dinner, and I always ask the ladies first. Lady 1 orders, fine, Lady 2 begins to order, and Lady 1 begins to spastically half-wave to me behind her friend. I'm trying to ignore stupid, Spazzy McLady 1, but I'm having trouble asking the menu questions with her right behind her friend. Finally, I turn to Lady 1, without saying a word. "We'd like separate checks." She says, out of breath from all that subtle waving. "Let me know at the end of your meal." I said this as quickly and dryly as possible and continued taking Lady 2's order. How rude?!?! And to think, she had to ask me that question right then, at that very moment, because God-forbid she may never see me again. Absurd. So fine, they order, whatever...then, as I'm delivering their food, Odd Man asks for another fork, I nod to him and continue delivering the tray. I haven't even left the table yet and he says, "My fork?" I look at him and I did say, "I'll have your fork in a moment, sir, I haven't left yet." I do feel bad about it now, but I felt it was so demanding at the time. I clearly acknowledged him when he asked for it. I'm not sure where he thought I could pull it from, but it really annoyed me. I made it up to them by giving them efficient service, and I brought them their separate checks without being reminded. Although, Lady 2 tried to remind me, but I anticipated it and answered before she could ask. They were decent tippers.
The next Mars-ian table were these two old women. It was like Grandmom and Great Grandmom out to dinner. Bad idea. I greeted the table to this, "I'm gonna need an orange soda, another side of salsa, chips no salt, extra paper napkins, and two plates." All in one breath. I shit you not. I said nothing and returned with their items. I felt like I was going to scream. I gave them one million years to look through the menu because every time I approached them, they still had no idea. Great Grandmom didn't have her glasses. Didn't have her glasses, or didn't feel like reading the menu herself. Every time I stopped by, I answered a few questions. Finally we start talking about one specific menu item, which is a basic grilled chicken breast dinner with fries, nothing fancy, very mild, yadda, yadda, yadda. I spent 15 minutes trying to talk to these women about this entree. Meanwhile, I had a margarita sitting at the bar. I tried to grab another server in view, but it was difficult. (I did make eye-contact with the woman waiting, so I think she understood that I was being held up.) These women were so confused. At one point, I was describing our vegetable medley (an alternative to fries) and I told them it was seasoned with black pepper, and she says, "Black peppers??" "No, black pepper." This is when I feel like slapping my forehead and walking away. Black peppers? Yes, we season everything with black peppers...on Mars! Finally, their order is in. Eating was a slow process, and when they were finished, they needed boxes. Well, at this point, I was tired, so I offered to bring them boxes. I knew they would be particular about the way it was packed, so I decided to save myself the hassle. I brought them boxes, and got, "I'm gonna need, another box, a cup for the salsa, a lid for the sauce, and fresh chips to-go." They also needed separate checks because the couldn't figure out what they each owed. What a mess. Senior Citizens should not be allowed to dine unsupervised. I've said that for a long time, and tonight it has been proven once again. I'm going to start a movement for necessary supervision.

See, no worries, I'll always find something to bitch about!

Close Saturday.


Food Service Ninja said...

let me address your guilt over i demand a fork guy-its RUDE to reask for a fork when you have NOT left the table -->if he was concerned you would forget all he had to was say dont forget about my fork in a light hearted manner

this is same kinda douchebag who demands to know where the rest of their food is when you OBVIOUSLY carried out all you could in the only 2 hands and arms you possess. This is usually done by a jerk at a 4 top and you brought out 2-3 entrees and some side items. I make it a point to mention I only have two hands.

As to the confused old birds I fell ya why folks who cant read expect every place they eat to be lit up like it was in direct full sunlight and provide them with eyeglasses in the EXACT prescription they need I do NOT understand. And for the ones that are young enough that they still work for a living as I have never seen a restaurant menu that was any smaller and most are a larger font than a standard business document.

Some of these bores will expect you to read them the entire menu too

Personally I would have informed the freebie seeker that the complimentary chips and sauce were for in house dining and you would be happy to box up hers that hadnt been eaten but you couldnt provide her with additional free chips.

But I do not work in a chain place so I can get away with fun stuff like that.

Dont let em get ya down sometimes everyone you get is off their meds.

Ali said...

Well, obviously, you should always have extra silverware in your pocket :)