Tonight started off fine. I was scheduled to close, so I went in with the mentality that I was going to turn tables all night, and make that money! Boy I couldn't have been more wrong. What's wrong with me?? How could I be so naive to think that a night would actually go smoothly? Okay, enough with the dramatics--I'm ready to vent!
Tonight I had four 4-tops, and I had a full section quickly. I didn't even rotate through twice before the hosts were pushing my tables together (our check-time average is 30 - 45 min). It was so fucking annoying! Mainly because it happens to me EVERY FUCKING WEEKEND. Sometimes I think it's a conspiracy, and the rest of the time I know it's because the moron-hosts running rotation triple-sat me in the beginning of the shift, so all of my tables were getting up around the same time. Stupid hosts. It was even more annoying knowing that we were also on a "smallie" wait (and, yes, I hate calling it that).
So, the six-top sits down, and I notice it's adults, so I'm pleased ("Margarita anyone??"). They were a little hard-to-judge at first, but then it became apparent that they were all the spawn of Satan, and had entered my establishment to bring the wrath of Hell down on my very soul...teehee. No, but they seemed annoyed by me, so that affected the way that I acted--kinda short, but kind and attentive. So, they order, and I deliver their food, a couple need drinks at this time, whatever. I go over to "check back," and one of the women just looks at me, points to her plate with her fork, and states, (with food in her mouth!), "My sour cream?" Oh, did you ask for sour cream? Sorry I didn't get your telepathic message. When I return with her precious sour cream, the rest of the tables starts spouting out that they want water, another beer, whatever, and this annoys me because they ALL have nearly-full drinks in front of them. I just brought them each waters and a refill/beer. I'm happy after I've pre-bussed--no one wants anything else, so I drop the check. They proceed to CAMP for one hour! For a six-top, I would say our average can be an hour or an hour and a half (especially if they're drinking, in which case--stay all night!). It was horrible. Then, my window-seat had campers too! I was nearly in tears at one point! I eventually began to pace back and forth through my section taking as much off the table as I could. I was so annoyed. I can't pay bills on this shit. They finally paid: Bill = $87 Tip = $17 Boo. (It definitely could have been worse, but I was disappointed--at least throw me a twenty--ya know??)
The hosts had every intention of giving me another six-top, but I gave her a look of desperation, and she didn't. I told her she could triple-seat me (which she would have done somehow anyway), but it made her happy. They double-sat me, then staggered the third--I would rather they all go down at the exact same time, but whatever. I figured the table saw I was busy, and, I'm very communicative with my tables--they always know what I'm doing, which may be annoying, but it keeps most from having to ask for something I'm already going to bring for them--I want them to know I'm doing my job.
I greet the 4-top, and get their drink order: diet, coke, coke, water. Meanwhile, I had to put in the other two tables' order, and finally give my window-seat campers their check. Well, when I deliver the drinks, I give the dude a tea by mistake (I'm human? oh, that's right), and he says, "I guess I ordered tea." What?! Fuck your sarcasm, dude. "Oh, I'm sorry, sir" and I sped off--and I was definitely pissed because when I went to dump the tea in the sink (at the wait-station--that's a no-no), the cup slipped out of my hand, into the sink, and tea splashed up--it was MUCH more dramatic than I intended. I push my way through the clusterfuck around the wait-station to get this man the water he ordered, and when I return, and apologize again, he points at the table and says, "Can we get more salsa?" Why do people think I have a salsa in my pocket? Ready to serve? Would you like a straw with that, sir? How about a tumbler-full to drink with your meal? "Sir, would you like me to take your order first, or do you want the salsa now?" I was totally pissed (I should've just walked away to get the salsa immediately...they would've loved that). When I brought the extra salsa, I also brought chips and refills for the two gulpers, so they wouldn't have to talk to me.
Word of the Day = annoying (used six times...sorry about that...bet it was...annoying...mmwwhaahahahaha)
Today = Boo-tastic.
Off tomorrow...Open Monday.