Okay, so a lot has been going on "behind the scenes" in my restaurant. I guess I've turned my bitchy-ness up a notch...I don't know...I am a happy person. But, I am jaded. It's a difficult position to be in--controlled by a career I hate because I can't find a decent job, and I have to pay my rent...at least. My life is dictated by the shifts I work each week. And, I hate my job. I am a slave to it, just as I am a slave to all the hungry people in the area...
I know I'm not the only one, but this realization has kinda put me in a funk. I've been re-reading some previous posts, and I don't have many good days...*Red Flag*
I do have to make some changes in my attitude...I have to learn to let things go.
I got to this point in the last restaurant I work in, but it took 6 years. I started there green, and left knowing more than I ever wanted to know about the restaurant business. (During that time, I also worked for three other places.)
After six years at the first restaurant, I had been planning a month-long trip, so I just told them I would call them when I got back to talk about the schedule. I was so tired of serving by that point--feeling similar to how I'm feeling now--that I decided I would never wait tables again. (Never say never, kids.) When I returned from my trip, I went in for lunch one day (alone) and talked with the manager. I never went back.
For the next three years, I didn't wait tables. But, when times get tough, and money gets tight (like it has been for the last year), the easiest and fastest way to make money is to wait tables. It is the truth. I think I just have a way of picking the places that make me work extremely hard for next to nothing, but fine-dining was never my thing. I can barely open a bottle of wine. I don't think I'd fit in...not with my potty-mouth.
So, now I worry that my job is in jeaprody because my attitude is sour before I even get there. I just don't want to be there. At all. I'm working on finding something else, but these things take time.
During that "time," I thought it would be beneficial for me to write down the perks of working in my restaurant:
1. I genuinely like (and get along with) the majority of the staff.
2. The food is delicious.
3. At close, the KM will let the staff eat what's left on the line.
4. We get a discount on food when we're working (Ammendment: Saturday and Sunday lunch-singles cannot order food. *Note: We do not get a discount on food if we're not working. The food we do get discounted we cannot take TO GO.)
5. I can walk out for a smoke break (if I ask permission, of course!).
Pretty measley list. I'll try to "add as I go," but this is all I've got.
Even though the list didn't work out as I planned, I am going to attempt looking to the brighter side of waiting tables--maybe the side that is so bright, it blinds me from seeing the all the shit that pisses me off.
I'll try.
Off tomorrow...Open Monday.
1 comment:
Burnout is never fun. Sucks that you're there.
I found myself there a while back, but it turned out that the bar was amplifying other things that were stressing me out in my life, not always the root. i.e. once my fiancee and I split, my bar burnout faded. Coincidence? I think not.
On the other hand, maybe your burnout is establishment specific, ergo it's time to check out other places. Have you considered working at a bar? It has its advantages: kids are few and far between, people are less picky about booze than food.
Otherwise, it might just be that waitressing is no one's dream job and there are many, many reasons for that.
Post a Comment